Is fear holding you back?

How often have you stopped yourself doing or saying something because you were afraid? Afraid of the consequences or scared of what may actually come out of your mouth.

The fear of the unknown is the worst. I don’t know about you but I can easily drive myself crazy with fears and worries from time to time. The human imagination is amazing isn’t it?

I’ve noticed lately that the issue of fear has been coming up more and more in my life and in the lives of those I work with on a daily basis. I thought it may be good to share some thoughts with you here, so this is why I am writing this today.

I’ve had several conversations lately with different people about fear. Often they don’t even recognise that it is fear that is driving them.

I spoke to a woman recently about trying Reiki but she was adamant that it was not for her – yet she had never even tried it. She had heard some stories about it which weren’t exactly true. She thought it was some form of psychic ability that would let me see all her deep, dark secrets. She was afraid of what can of worms it may open for her if she let it in.

Another gentleman spoke to me about it as well – but he was afraid of what other people may think if he tried this “airy fairy new age nonsense”.

I’ve had many fears myself and I was just reminded of one while watching a television programme earlier today. A female character in the TV show was married but had previously been working abroad and whilst she was away she’d had a liaison with another woman. Fear of the depth of her connection with this woman had gripped her and she had flown home determined to be the perfect wife and mother. The problem was that she actually loved this other woman and as a result needed to turn her life upside down in order to prove her love was real. She had to admit to herself and her husband that she was in love with someone else.

Her fear almost cost her the happiness she so desperately desired. Fear of upsetting people, fear of hurting people around her, fear of what others would think, fear of admitting to herself that she was not the person she thought she was … oh yes, been there myself. Never easy that one!

Fear is useful in some instances – a healthy fear of heights for example will perhaps save your life and prevent you from taking unnecessary risks. A fear of ill health may motivate you into making healthy life choices to prevent illness. A fear of burning yourself will stop you putting your hand in the fire.

The problem arises when the fear takes over. The lady in my first example would have greatly benefited from trying Reiki. From the little I knew of her story I understood that she was trying to be very strong and outwardly happy. I could see the hidden pain on her face and the ache in her heart but I recognised the walls that she had built up around herself, for I too had built similar walls during my life.

I knew that Reiki would gently loosen the foundations of the walls and that over time, with love and support, they would come down and allow her to emerge as a new person. As someone who had found her spark once more. Someone whose light had been turned back on.

I knew that the journey from where she was, to where she could be, wouldn’t be plain sailing. I knew, from personal experience, that sometimes it would be extremely painful. Change is painful – it has to be, otherwise we would never evolve. Sometimes things have to hurt in order to force a change and make us grow.

She is not ready for those changes yet because her fear of what might happen is holding her back. Her fear of “opening the can of worms” – the fear of the unknown consequences of digging behind the walls, is preventing her from moving forwards. Her greatest fear is maybe to admit that she is simply not as happy as she would like to be – but that then means she needs to address why – and therein lies the problem perhaps!

The gentleman’s fear of what others may think of him is holding him back too. He too would greatly benefit from the stress-busting and emotionally healing energy of Reiki but again, his fear prevents him from taking the next step. His persona as the big strong boss man may have to soften – perhaps a fear of being vulnerable lies at the heart of his decision to avoid Reiki like the plague.

We are our own worst enemies. We hide away from our fears instead of facing them and bringing them out into the light. For example – for those of us who are afraid of spiders – it is so much worse when the spider disappears from view than when it is on the wall – yes?

Think about it like this – imagine you are in your bedroom, it’s dark and you are all alone. You have been watching a scary movie and your imagination starts to play tricks on you. You hear noises and floors creaking. Your heart starts to race and you begin to sweat a little. You have this over-whelming urge to hide under the duvet and pray it’s all a bad dream. You squeeze your eyes shut tightly and hold your breath … the monster is approaching! Scary right?

Then you take control of the situation. You bravely reach out your hand – yes, you reach out from the safety of under the duvet, and you turn on the light. Bright light illuminates the room all around you. You poke your head out from the duvet and look around. There is no monster. There is nothing to be frightened of. It is all OK. You can rest easy once more.

You did the hard bit. You were really brave and you reached out to turn on the light. Having Reiki is like reaching out to turn on the light. Taking that first step and booking the session is often the hardest part. Once you realise that Reiki is not going to come in like a wrecking ball and knock the stuffing out of you, you begin to relax and enjoy the sessions … and that is when the real healing begins.

I like to let Reiki speak for itself. It works in different ways for every person who experiences it. For some it is simply a lovely relaxing treatment that allows them to an hour out of their hectic schedule. For those who are brave enough to really let it in, and who are ready to face their inner demons head on, it can be a transformational healing force.

I’ve experienced first hand how gentle Reiki can be, whilst being incredibly powerful. It gently shone the light on areas of my life that needed attention. It didn’t force me to do anything with them – it simply shone the light on them. It brought them into focus. It helped me realise that change was necessary. It highlighted my pain and helped me realise that by facing my fears and my inner demons I could uncover my true self and really live my life.

It continues to do this every day. I am fortunate and blessed to be able to work with Reiki healing energy every day. It is part of who I am now. When I look back on my life I barely recognise the broken young girl I used to be.

I am still a work in progress just like everyone else. Reiki is my big light now and when I feel afraid I simply shine the light on to my fears and bring them up to the surface. I confront them. I still have fears – I am human just like you. We all have them. Reiki helps me to manage them, deal with them and make changes so I can be happy and full of love.

I am so grateful for Reiki. I am so happy that I found the courage to use it to turn on the light in my life and to make the changes I so desperately needed to make.

What about you? Are you brave enough to reach out and turn on the light?

 

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